The criminal justice system is multi-tiered affair. There's one for the rich. One for whites. And one for property owners. Women and minorities need not apply.
It is not just wealthy and powerful men who participate in this abuse. As emphasized by Jackson Katz, "average" men rarely turn down an opportunity to take advantage of their male privilege to sexually assault women and girls. For example, date rape, fraternity behavior, the use of rape as a gang initiation rite, and the Pelicot rape case in France.
This is a good opportunity to come out in force for Denim Day on Wed. April 29, an international day to recognize that it is never a victim's fault when she is abused. https://denimday.org/
• In the USA, an estimated 20% of girls and 8% of boys are sexually abused before they are 18 years old. Many more experience other horrific abuses. This trauma is for their whole lives.
It's all around us every day. How can we allow this?
Hasn't it ever been thus? "Boys will be boys" is a common refrain with regard to boys disrespecting girls. Teen girls are chastised for the way they dress (claiming they're to blame when boys can't (or won't) control themselves. Adult men in the workplace typically get away with harassing females (some who work in subordinate roles but sometimes even women in upper management). And the only difference between those guys and the perps on Epstein Island is their net wealth. As Son of Hitler--aka Shitler--once claimed, if you're a star, they "let you do it." (Au contraire, jackass: if you've got money, you get off scot-free.)
.. I wonder, but more I hope, by Ellie wading into this ugly pool, someday, sometime, she and others will pull out the plug, and this filthy pool will be drained..
As the little girls perform "Keep Sweet," the men (through their portraits) are looking down at them, their mirrors, their performance, their identities. For so many, never a moment of real freedom.
Wow! I was raised in a fundamentalist home and although no sexually abused, I still have the scars to show for it. When I read a column like yours, I do not feel alone. Thank you.
Another great article. I had never heard the story of Ellen and William Craft. I can really feel why Ellen cried when she was able to take the whiteface costume off. It would have been such a relief. I'm so glad that they were able to make it to safety. Thank you Kahlil. That little bit of education made my day.
Ellie, a great piece is always, but horribly unsettling. You're so right about the purity culture. I wasn't brought up in a fundamentalist church, but in an earlier time I was always taught to be nice, don't argue, don't dress immodestly. Sex or periods were never talked abou. Also, there was no such thing as rape. As a result I was totally clueless when I went off to college and became one of the one in four women you talk about. It affected my life for a long time and led to deep depression and several suicide attempts. I still assume that when things go wrong it's somehow my fault. That's my first reaction always. Then I talk sense to myself and try to escape that mindset. It sure is hard though when it's been drilled into you for so long.
One can only believe what they can accept as truth. Confirmation bias makes it harder to determine truth, when disinformation and misinformation abounds.
Your commitment to your writing and your cause for abused women is truly inspiring. I do not know how you maintain the energy to plug away day after day. You once mentioned your Father being concerned about your health, and I have to agree with him. Please take care.
The criminal justice system is multi-tiered affair. There's one for the rich. One for whites. And one for property owners. Women and minorities need not apply.
It is not just wealthy and powerful men who participate in this abuse. As emphasized by Jackson Katz, "average" men rarely turn down an opportunity to take advantage of their male privilege to sexually assault women and girls. For example, date rape, fraternity behavior, the use of rape as a gang initiation rite, and the Pelicot rape case in France.
This is a good opportunity to come out in force for Denim Day on Wed. April 29, an international day to recognize that it is never a victim's fault when she is abused. https://denimday.org/
Great read. TY.
Thank you for writing this. 🫶✊
This was a great article.
• In the USA, an estimated 20% of girls and 8% of boys are sexually abused before they are 18 years old. Many more experience other horrific abuses. This trauma is for their whole lives.
It's all around us every day. How can we allow this?
Powerful
Hasn't it ever been thus? "Boys will be boys" is a common refrain with regard to boys disrespecting girls. Teen girls are chastised for the way they dress (claiming they're to blame when boys can't (or won't) control themselves. Adult men in the workplace typically get away with harassing females (some who work in subordinate roles but sometimes even women in upper management). And the only difference between those guys and the perps on Epstein Island is their net wealth. As Son of Hitler--aka Shitler--once claimed, if you're a star, they "let you do it." (Au contraire, jackass: if you've got money, you get off scot-free.)
.. I wonder, but more I hope, by Ellie wading into this ugly pool, someday, sometime, she and others will pull out the plug, and this filthy pool will be drained..
As the little girls perform "Keep Sweet," the men (through their portraits) are looking down at them, their mirrors, their performance, their identities. For so many, never a moment of real freedom.
Having grown up in purity culture - this is spot on. 100%
Wow! I was raised in a fundamentalist home and although no sexually abused, I still have the scars to show for it. When I read a column like yours, I do not feel alone. Thank you.
Another great article. I had never heard the story of Ellen and William Craft. I can really feel why Ellen cried when she was able to take the whiteface costume off. It would have been such a relief. I'm so glad that they were able to make it to safety. Thank you Kahlil. That little bit of education made my day.
Ellie, a great piece is always, but horribly unsettling. You're so right about the purity culture. I wasn't brought up in a fundamentalist church, but in an earlier time I was always taught to be nice, don't argue, don't dress immodestly. Sex or periods were never talked abou. Also, there was no such thing as rape. As a result I was totally clueless when I went off to college and became one of the one in four women you talk about. It affected my life for a long time and led to deep depression and several suicide attempts. I still assume that when things go wrong it's somehow my fault. That's my first reaction always. Then I talk sense to myself and try to escape that mindset. It sure is hard though when it's been drilled into you for so long.
One can only believe what they can accept as truth. Confirmation bias makes it harder to determine truth, when disinformation and misinformation abounds.
Your commitment to your writing and your cause for abused women is truly inspiring. I do not know how you maintain the energy to plug away day after day. You once mentioned your Father being concerned about your health, and I have to agree with him. Please take care.